Tuesday, October 17, 2006


Create Your Own Native American Superhero!!!

In honor of DC's "Relaunch Native American Superheroes" Month, we present a handy guide so you, too, can create an original Native American Superhero just like REAL comic book writers!

Some Things to Keep In Mind:

1) There are only two Native American tribes: Navajo and Cheyenne. And sometimes Apache.

2) All Native Americans live in teepees or pueblos located on impoverished reservations somewhere Arizona-looking.

3) All Native Americans are magical and good-looking, kind of like elves!

4) All Native Americans over the age of, say, 65 look like they are really 257 and are shaman, kind of like Gandalf!

5) All Native Americans, therefore, have a grandfather, great-grandfather or third cousin twice-removed who can impart magical knowledge to them, if only they would give up the White Man's ways and return to the land of their ancestors. Sometimes, this relative is dead and appears as a ghost or severed skull.

6) All Native Americans have an English first name and a two-part Indian last name that usually combines an animal and an adjective and always sounds cool. Most Indian ancestors, being magical, were able to see far enough into the future to pick names that describe their descendents, for example, a fast-runner conveniently named Wingfoot.

7) Every Indian tribe in America is familiar with the concept of Manitou, no matter what the Algonquins might tell you.

8) Nearly all Indians are veterans. Occasionally, they are social workers. Exactly one is a doctor. There are no Native American scientists, astronauts, lawyers or business-people.

9) All Indian superhero costumes must feature buckskin, beadwork and leather fringes. Extra points if you can work in some feathers, preferably in the form of a "warbonnet." Female Indians traditionally dressed like a frontier version of Britney Spears or backup singers for OutKast.

10) All Native Americans are chiefs, or are related to chiefs.

11) Your Indian superhero must have a code-name that sounds "Indian," like Thunderbird, Warpath or (God help us) Super-Chief.

12) Native Americans are ALWAYS serious and never, ever crack a smile or show any emotion other than stoic resolve, kind of like Vulcans! Likewise, all Native Americans speak very formally at all times.

Finally, remember that all Native Americans have inherent super powers, like super-tracking, ultra-vision or animal telepathy, again kind of like Elves! Or maybe Vulcans!

If you stick with these handy hints, you'll be cranking out original (not to mention culturally sensitive) Native American superheroes in no time! Good luck!


Good one. I'll link to it in my Newspaper Rock blog. But the tribes should be Cheyenne or Apache with a few Lakota or Navajo.

Of course, my PEACE PARTY heroes violate several of these rules. Occupations = lawyer and artist, no shamans or elders involved in their origin, no cool-sounding given or superhero names, etc. Check 'em out at BlueCornComics.com.
That seems only fair, since I linked to you a couple of times in the post. And I need to ask my handy local comics dealer why he isn't carrying Peace Party.
I find this so stereotypical of what people who are non-american indian think....I find this very offensive and I am truly disgusted... Me being an American Indian I dont see what you gain to accomplish in having such mis informed information dealing with American Indians....we dont all live in tipis...and we sure as hell dont have shamen...leave that garbage for the newagers....I have seen the peace party heroes and that is something positive ....You need to stop looking at them old westerns and realize....hollywood told you all a lie.....

Your dealer probably isn't carrying PEACE PARTY because we haven't published a new issue in a while. When we publish the PP graphic novel in a year or so, then you should talk to him.
If you'll read Freedom Fighters, I think you'll find that the newBlack Condor breaks with MANY of those "traditions".

But he's very goodlooking; superheroes are always goodlooking.
Tanesha, this post is meant to be sarcastic. I'm very proud of my heritage; I was trying to mock comic book writers who always seem to use the same NDN stereotypes over and over again.

scipio: yeah, I picked up Uncle Sam and I did like the new Black Condor. For one thing, the author obviously took the time to do a little research on Navajo history and culture. Of course, he still has the whole "mystical origin" thing going, but he's still WAY better than Super-Chief, who I hear has been killed off, anyway.
Tanena, not Tanesha! Anyway, as the world's most sarcastic person, I understood Hale's take on creating Native superheroes. No problem here.

See Super-Chief Lives and Black Condor Takes Off for more on these characters.
"Tanena, not Tanesha!"

Gah! You're completely right; I stupidly misspelled her name. My apologies!
I'm NDN, and I thought this post was hilarious. Very indicative of what so many people, being quite earnest, actually think and believe.
Funny you should mention that. I recently talked to my yougest's kindergarten class for Native America Heritage Month. My favorite question (besides 50 variations on 'do you live in a teepee?')? The little boy who asked me if NDNs "fight crime."
Yes, yes, we do.
Could Tanena Davis please contact me...I believe its been said tthat we are the same person by certain people on the net...and I'd like to clear it up if possible. There are a few websites with your picture and details posted claiming you to be me.

Please contact NativeAmericanUnity@gmail.com

So Native Americans are presented as honorable, handsome, warriors that are in tune with nature.

That's horrible.
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